The phrase 'she who owns her own things' rang for hours in my head the morning before I gave you your Izon/Ijaw name.
I had selected and preserved your Izon/Ijaw name long before i concieved you though. (Grandma Grace perfected it shortly after you where born).
You are always my Dabo (Dabor).
Meaning: Leader. She who leads.
Friday, 25 July 2014
Telling Merit #5
When I seek evidence on HOW my society views me as a WOMAN, I look at his Laws and his attitude towards women. I see his ways but I do not HAVE to accept his discrimination. If I do, What will I tell my daughters when they ask me what I did when I saw his idea of me?
Society is a man. Sadly, most women became him. Discriminatory.
8/19/2013. Telling Merit.
Society is a man. Sadly, most women became him. Discriminatory.
8/19/2013. Telling Merit.
Chronicling The Last Days. 26/9/2013
September 26, 2013
Wednesday.I would take Merit to her home-for-a-while. We would see a multiple-car accident on our way there with one car burning with a person still inside it. The smell of death, of burning flesh and the presence of something chilly would fill our car.
Home. Hettie Chuga's demise would be a year old today. The memorial service would be emotional, I would feel my heart breaking. I would sniff severally for the next hour, trying not to break down with my Merit in my arms till we would return to the Chuga's residence and then the tears would come for the next 4 hours.
My older Sister, Jane, would call to ask if I am fine throughout the duration of my emotional breakdown. She feels in her spirit that I am down. Oler Sister Boes will call and say;
'Everything will be fine Tuma. You are the strongest girl I know in your circumstances and your age. It is just months. Merit will be fine'. Mother would call, she misses me,misses Merit.
I would calm down when an aunt would scold me to stop crying.
'If you cry like this because you are only leaving her here for this short time when Mummy has lost her's to death forever, how do you want her to feel, to cry? She won't be happy with you oh!' ...
Des (Merit's Dad and Hetty's only sibbling) would light a memorial candle in a semi-floating lamp he designed with butterflies for Hettie. That's her favourite thing he says. Next year, he'll light two. When Merit gets older,they'll light Hettie's lamps together,I tell him. Her grandmom already calls her 'aunty Mashi' after Hetty...Mashi is Hetty's other name. It means something lovely, something so beautiful it hurts the eyes.
I would sit in a cab on my way to Abuja and type furiously on my blackberry. The tears keep clouding my sight. I would read what I typed later and it would read; bhtsawhklngdswtui¥nbddsabhhyjf
Des (Merit's Dad and Hetty's only sibbling) would light a memorial candle in a semi-floating lamp he designed with butterflies for Hettie. That's her favourite thing he says. Next year, he'll light two. When Merit gets older,they'll light Hettie's lamps together,I tell him. Her grandmom already calls her 'aunty Mashi' after Hetty...Mashi is Hetty's other name. It means something lovely, something so beautiful it hurts the eyes.
I would sit in a cab on my way to Abuja and type furiously on my blackberry. The tears keep clouding my sight. I would read what I typed later and it would read; bhtsawhklngdswtui¥nbddsabhhyjf
Senseless gibberish.
Thursday: I think Merit has woken up now. She would be looking around to see my face. She would listen hard to hear me sing in a language I don't undersand,that makes her laugh with her hands clasped,held up to her mouth,laughing. She would be missing me now,as I do, her. I think of my Mother and 5 other sisters who all wanted to be the ones to nurse Merit till my return from Aberdeen, where i would be studying for a Nasters in Law. My older brother Dan who wanted to be the one to take her too...the teetings that were held just for where she should/would stay and how my Uncle and everybody else worried...I am thinking: See, that is the thing with when your family is closely knit like that...and when you meet the loveliness that is Merit.
Home. Blessing, Merit's home nanny, is crying again. The children in my neighbouhood came early in the morning to see if Merit came back with me. They cries when I told them they'll see us in 3 months or so. I am the strong one now, petting the smaller ones to stop crying with biscuits. Be strong, I tell me.Be strong.
I will board a French Airways plane for Aberdeen on a Satuday night and sleep through the flight to France and arrive in Scotland the next day.
Thoughts on New Love
I am thinking about how love looks like when she is new.
Recently, I had gone to see a friend on his birthday. Arriving there, I met other friends of ours too, one of them brought a new friend of his with him. He did not have to tell us they were dating, I didn’t have to ask. I was good at seeing the new faces of love when she presents herself, so I watched. He left the room. I started a conversat...ion with the new girl and good to words, new love showed her many faces. It was so, em, sweet. She showed up in the way he popped his head into the room from the kitchen door ever so often, to just look at her and share a private smile. New love showed in the way their hands seemed to always touch over the Ipad games they played when he returned to the living room. It showed in the hushed tones they used, like the room was too crowded for them, for their new emotions.
New love makes us sprint in newer strides, in giddy gaits.
New love makes us more interesting to the people that see us with that love-eye, the one we had been missing before they crossed our paths. New love intoxicates us with blinding consequences.
New love is sometimes the reason we aspire to certain heights, and change our previously held views about commitment and whatnots.
It is quite hard to hide her when she is new. New love does that to people. Problem always becomes, how do you show her when she is old…older?
Lady Jokes
he is educated, he says, And Patience Jonathan is a simi literate woman he says. He blames the Nigerian President for not getting a properly educated woman as wife, you see, in his opinion, the security situation in the Nigeria is largely this; That the president married a semi literate woman. I should really keep these things to myself (maybe next time), but I held the next metal pole I could find, for extra support, (so he could push me down in anger) and typed a response;
'Aren't you forgetting your history, my dear, if not for an illiterate woman, would you be here typing this version of your cure to the Nigerian situation''?
I struck the wrong cord, it was too accurate a question as his mother didnt go to school too. So I apologised for having reminded him that his parent could barely read and write or speak English too. I felt sorry. I doubt that he saw my point beyond the sting.
People need to stop with the 'semi literate Nigerian First Lady' jokes. Instead of making them seem like the educated smart mouths who can call out the stupid ones, they actually sound pretty stupid to me too. There are very important questions and things Nigerians should be asking and talking about. People making these jokes sound like insensitive prats, making fun of the emotions of another person while serious issues of mass deaths and kidnapping/child trafficking and possible sex slavery are the very issues people should be concerned with right now.
'Aren't you forgetting your history, my dear, if not for an illiterate woman, would you be here typing this version of your cure to the Nigerian situation''?
I struck the wrong cord, it was too accurate a question as his mother didnt go to school too. So I apologised for having reminded him that his parent could barely read and write or speak English too. I felt sorry. I doubt that he saw my point beyond the sting.
People need to stop with the 'semi literate Nigerian First Lady' jokes. Instead of making them seem like the educated smart mouths who can call out the stupid ones, they actually sound pretty stupid to me too. There are very important questions and things Nigerians should be asking and talking about. People making these jokes sound like insensitive prats, making fun of the emotions of another person while serious issues of mass deaths and kidnapping/child trafficking and possible sex slavery are the very issues people should be concerned with right now.
Our Insensitivity To The Suicidal
You read 'student commits suicide over results' and you go 'oh? how stupid? Examination results don't mean anything, don't give jobs' bla bla. To you, the thought in itself is irrational, stupid, inconsiderate, unholy...
Same goes when the man killed himself because he is too poor to feed his family, or when the boy killed himself because the girl didn't love him back or marry him, or when the Billionaire got sad because he didn't have what to do with his money anymore, or the other that girl cut her wrists because her nose and boobs where not as pointy as the other girls in her class...
It is easy to judge another person's irrational acts when you are not the one with the emotions.
This here is the point; All pain is pain and hurts just as much.
And no, do not tell her she is being stupid because she feels that way too. You would be insensitively stupid to feel that way too.
Same goes when the man killed himself because he is too poor to feed his family, or when the boy killed himself because the girl didn't love him back or marry him, or when the Billionaire got sad because he didn't have what to do with his money anymore, or the other that girl cut her wrists because her nose and boobs where not as pointy as the other girls in her class...
It is easy to judge another person's irrational acts when you are not the one with the emotions.
This here is the point; All pain is pain and hurts just as much.
And no, do not tell her she is being stupid because she feels that way too. You would be insensitively stupid to feel that way too.
Thursday, 24 July 2014
To Happiness. To Sadness.
We don't have to be happy all the time.
We don't have to be sad all the time also.
We don't have to be sad all the time also.
Wisdom Tooth #2
At all times, at least one party in a seemingly successful relationship owes his/her happiness to a previous partner. Ex relationships are like the death of a Phoenix, without an ex, there would not have been the possibility of the current relationship.
But we are all always careful of exes too, especially the one's immediately preceding a present relationship,or the longest previous relationship or the one's we know 'got away' with a marital status, distance or a conflicting gene type. We know every time spent with another presents a box of emotional experiences,of adventures that make us who we are now.
We all owe our present romantic happiness (and sometimes,sadness) to previous relationships, even the ones that cheated on us.
But we are all always careful of exes too, especially the one's immediately preceding a present relationship,or the longest previous relationship or the one's we know 'got away' with a marital status, distance or a conflicting gene type. We know every time spent with another presents a box of emotional experiences,of adventures that make us who we are now.
We all owe our present romantic happiness (and sometimes,sadness) to previous relationships, even the ones that cheated on us.
On the Pointlessness of Theories
You know the thing about theories? They are mostly problematic in practice. Most of them do not work, you have to be able to try again and again to get them right in real life. To have any grand theories about men, love, you have to have dated atleast 2 of them. Your heart must be broken a couple of times. you must have felt the highs and the lows of love to qualify. As a woman, to test run a theory on social death and or apathy, try having a child out of wedlock and by yourself (in Nigeria). If you make it out alive, the lessons will permanently be learnt. You will loose friends, your lover, you will lose the confidence that people you loved had for you. you will be judged by people with the least moral standing, But you will have a different kind of insight into who you think you are as well.
The thing with theories is almost like the problem with Nigerian ideals. They only work on paper.
The thing with theories is almost like the problem with Nigerian ideals. They only work on paper.
Wisdom Tooth #1
This is what I found; Wait till a man NEEDS you first before giving yourself to him. No amount of sacrifice will make an uncommitted man keep you. A man that does not realize that you are essential to him will not value your worth.
Social Safety
It helps to be physically guarded/security concious with people u interact with over a social media website. A girl was allegedly murdered by her Facebook pals in Lagos Months ago.
When people you do not physically know but are social media 'pals' with you write on my wall/inbox and tell you to go meet them or ask for your address, that they want to meet you, try to be civil but decline such offers. The thing is, there are perverts and good people around these days. If you must meet someone you do not know, meet them in public places, be accompanied by someone else, inform a family member or friend first and let the person u are meeting know that others know you are meeting him/her! Take/save his/her picture and send it to a friend or family member,update your status with him/her in it.
There are perverts out there these days looking for people they can drag into their nests. Take adequate security measures with people you do not know.
When people you do not physically know but are social media 'pals' with you write on my wall/inbox and tell you to go meet them or ask for your address, that they want to meet you, try to be civil but decline such offers. The thing is, there are perverts and good people around these days. If you must meet someone you do not know, meet them in public places, be accompanied by someone else, inform a family member or friend first and let the person u are meeting know that others know you are meeting him/her! Take/save his/her picture and send it to a friend or family member,update your status with him/her in it.
There are perverts out there these days looking for people they can drag into their nests. Take adequate security measures with people you do not know.
Bits of Encouragement
Sometimes, we worry over problems that are tiny-specs when placed alongside other likely scenarios. We forget sometimes that things could have turned out a lot worse.
For example, your frequently-away-from-home dad could have been the your-father-died-when-I-was-pr
The single mother with the cute 3 year old son could have been the married-for-30-years-without-a-
You may consider suicide because you failed an exam,didn't graduate from school for years or had your hand amputated from a disease or an accident. But then, it could have been a lot worse. You could have been a vegetable,strung on an hospital bed,brain damaged.
It is hard to accept the challenges that we constantly face as human beings but do not despair. things could always have been worse off. And, if you hang in there just a bit more, you will get out of that situation stronger and wiser and better equipped to face the next challenge.
For example, your frequently-away-from-home dad could have been the your-father-died-when-I-was-pr
The single mother with the cute 3 year old son could have been the married-for-30-years-without-a-
You may consider suicide because you failed an exam,didn't graduate from school for years or had your hand amputated from a disease or an accident. But then, it could have been a lot worse. You could have been a vegetable,strung on an hospital bed,brain damaged.
It is hard to accept the challenges that we constantly face as human beings but do not despair. things could always have been worse off. And, if you hang in there just a bit more, you will get out of that situation stronger and wiser and better equipped to face the next challenge.
Miracle in a bottle
January 3rd, 2013.
Bigsis (my older sister) visited me in Abuja while returning from a church program in Lagos 3 days ago. She brought me gifts, religious books, bottles of 'holy water' and candles anointed by the Man of God. The water, in a tiny little bottle with pictures of the 'man of God' on its sides did cost her 5000 Naira (£20) and would heal all sicknesses, chase demons too, she tells me. (I wanted to know is the water would save me spot in heaven too? She heard my sarcasm and got offended by it.)
I do not have demons to chase or sicknesses that need curing. I actually would have preferred a cash gift of the water's worth, really. I accepted to accept the books only. The water can be given to someone else, I said. If even salvation, knowledge, wisdom, grace and the gifts of the holy spirit are free, why should an 'anointed' water in drops cost a ton? Why will anybody spend that much on something so glaringly entrepreneurial? Why do (even) educated people fan the businesses of these pastorprenures?
'You do not understand kingdom principles' Bigsis says.
I respect my sister a lot, as expected. She is educated too. Could she be right though? Maybe I really have been corrupted by logical reasoning, an ability to read the bible to myself and understand it for myself which leads me to not accept this 'miracles for sale' bottle of water. We argued about this for 3 days. She was adamant. I refused to see her views on why a pastors water would heal but not one's naked believe in the word of God. No sides won.
*Pastorprenure; A pastor who uses his church, ideas or sermons to money make money.
Bigsis (my older sister) visited me in Abuja while returning from a church program in Lagos 3 days ago. She brought me gifts, religious books, bottles of 'holy water' and candles anointed by the Man of God. The water, in a tiny little bottle with pictures of the 'man of God' on its sides did cost her 5000 Naira (£20) and would heal all sicknesses, chase demons too, she tells me. (I wanted to know is the water would save me spot in heaven too? She heard my sarcasm and got offended by it.)
I do not have demons to chase or sicknesses that need curing. I actually would have preferred a cash gift of the water's worth, really. I accepted to accept the books only. The water can be given to someone else, I said. If even salvation, knowledge, wisdom, grace and the gifts of the holy spirit are free, why should an 'anointed' water in drops cost a ton? Why will anybody spend that much on something so glaringly entrepreneurial? Why do (even) educated people fan the businesses of these pastorprenures?
'You do not understand kingdom principles' Bigsis says.
I respect my sister a lot, as expected. She is educated too. Could she be right though? Maybe I really have been corrupted by logical reasoning, an ability to read the bible to myself and understand it for myself which leads me to not accept this 'miracles for sale' bottle of water. We argued about this for 3 days. She was adamant. I refused to see her views on why a pastors water would heal but not one's naked believe in the word of God. No sides won.
*Pastorprenure; A pastor who uses his church, ideas or sermons to money make money.
Telling Merit #3
The neighbor's dog kept crying in a distinctly pitiful tone the night before Grandma died. It was a small, sorrowful sound. My sister and I recognized that sound from some 15 years ago. Our dog (we had him when i was still a young girl), kizzy, died after crying in such similar tones. kizzy, on the evening the python swallowed and vomited him and his 6 puppies, cried, like he knew he would be murdered that night. Older sister Jane and I reminisced about Kizzy a bit and went to bed. I felt a little bit of death hanging around...like a to-be. Ominous.
The Next morning, Mother called. Great Grandma, my mother's ma, had died. The Dog is barking now.
Grandma is dead.
All I remember about her chats is her account of the day I was born. I wasn't as close to her as most of my older siblings and I feel a sense of deprive about it. When mother and father left for England to study (before I was born), three of my older ones were left in the care of Grandma until my parents returned for them. Last I saw granny? Years. I am sad too that I do not have a photo with her. But then, when you ask how granny looked like, I would reply;
'Granny had the kindest eyes. She was strong, resilient and tough. She was approximately 110 years old, but ate meat till the day she died and enjoyed the life she lived'.
Telling Merit. 2/7/2013
The Next morning, Mother called. Great Grandma, my mother's ma, had died. The Dog is barking now.
Grandma is dead.
All I remember about her chats is her account of the day I was born. I wasn't as close to her as most of my older siblings and I feel a sense of deprive about it. When mother and father left for England to study (before I was born), three of my older ones were left in the care of Grandma until my parents returned for them. Last I saw granny? Years. I am sad too that I do not have a photo with her. But then, when you ask how granny looked like, I would reply;
'Granny had the kindest eyes. She was strong, resilient and tough. She was approximately 110 years old, but ate meat till the day she died and enjoyed the life she lived'.
Telling Merit. 2/7/2013
The bullet joke
Abuja. 2/21/2013
The taxi didn't stop early enough at the military check point leading to the Presidential Clinic as we were driven to my sister's workplace.
'My bullets run faster than your cab', armed man warns.
The cabby is profuse with apologies, and I, for no obvious reason, feels the urge to laugh, and do:-)
Armed man has a good nature, he joins in. The treat was mildly asserted but the massage was received.
'Doc, going to work?' He asks my sister. She responds. He wove us free to go.
Sometimes, the way a thing is said makes almost all the difference. Phrases, dipped in sweetness or harm triggers the course of perceived jitters or calming responses.
My long leave started today and I am already so restless that I followed my sister to her hospital, I am an On-call Lawyer in a hospital today:-) My job? Cleaning her hospital-provided accommodation and moving her furniture around. :-)
The taxi didn't stop early enough at the military check point leading to the Presidential Clinic as we were driven to my sister's workplace.
'My bullets run faster than your cab', armed man warns.
The cabby is profuse with apologies, and I, for no obvious reason, feels the urge to laugh, and do:-)
Armed man has a good nature, he joins in. The treat was mildly asserted but the massage was received.
'Doc, going to work?' He asks my sister. She responds. He wove us free to go.
Sometimes, the way a thing is said makes almost all the difference. Phrases, dipped in sweetness or harm triggers the course of perceived jitters or calming responses.
My long leave started today and I am already so restless that I followed my sister to her hospital, I am an On-call Lawyer in a hospital today:-) My job? Cleaning her hospital-provided accommodation and moving her furniture around. :-)
Telling Merit #2
Saturday: The grandparents, they visited for inspection. Ah! The hair is exactly like the Father's! The face, the feet and toes! Ah! She has a strong grasp! They beamed. We chatted a lot too. Your Paternal Granddad is a proper Historian like my Mother. Teachers and Theologians! How they love giving their knowledge in words!
As a birth gift, you would get an elementary published book about the Mada language/people, granddad promised, but as a condition, I must learn to tie the wrappers they bought me as a proper Nigerian woman, he added. We agreed I could make them into cloths instead:-) I am hopeless when it comes to tying wrappers.
Sunday: You got two extra names and an unofficial Nickname today. 'She shall be called RHISWEMISHI because 'God has wiped away our tears', Granddad said in Mada.
She is NANKAL for 'God has heard' but I would call her 'Mashi' a lot too. Do you know what it means? I do, I replied and remembered Mashi. It means something pleasant to the eyes, something painfully beautiful, like her, like you:-)
Telling Merit. March 4. 2013.
As a birth gift, you would get an elementary published book about the Mada language/people, granddad promised, but as a condition, I must learn to tie the wrappers they bought me as a proper Nigerian woman, he added. We agreed I could make them into cloths instead:-) I am hopeless when it comes to tying wrappers.
Sunday: You got two extra names and an unofficial Nickname today. 'She shall be called RHISWEMISHI because 'God has wiped away our tears', Granddad said in Mada.
She is NANKAL for 'God has heard' but I would call her 'Mashi' a lot too. Do you know what it means? I do, I replied and remembered Mashi. It means something pleasant to the eyes, something painfully beautiful, like her, like you:-)
Telling Merit. March 4. 2013.
Thoughts on Anxiety
This too is true. Time resolves all things. All anxiety caused by an expected event becomes unnecessary after the event happens. And most often than not, a new life softens even the hardest hearts.
The Placenta Analogy
See, the Placenta stores food/feeds the fetus but immediately after the birth of the baby it is thrown away as garbage wrapped in a black disposal bag and burried without a ceremony...
Kinda like how we treat the people that saw us through the rough times when times were hard isnt it? We are quick to forget the people that placed us where we are now, that struggled to put us through our tough times. We make new friends befitting our social status once things change for the better and leave 'those people' behind...
Did this make you think just now?
Telling Merit #1
'I make this generalisation loosely, but every Parent's wish is for there children to remain children, to enjoy their childhood,their innocence, for the longest time. Growing up is not always as fun as children think it is. I remember I wanted to be grown up since I was a toddler:-) I wanted to finish school, to be independent,to work and buy myself cars, to be grown enough to hold myself responsible for myself... I am largely grown now,but I sort of wish now that I kept my childhood,my innocence a little bit longer than I did.'
Culled from my collection of articles~#Telling Merit
Culled from my collection of articles~#Telling Merit
Thoughts on Immunization
Friday night. I am seated on detachable couch-pillows on the floor, watching an episode of Law and Order: Special victims unit. This episode features a mother on trial for 2nd degree murder for refusing to vaccinate her 4 year old son against measles after he came in contact with a younger child, infected her and resulted to her death...
The movie credits denied the events were non fictitious, no actual resemblance to real happenings but this got me thinking about vaccinations, Child immunization and the hard choices we make for our children, for their own good.
See, the thing is, immunization visits are painful for Merit, and hard for me. For the past 4 months, we had made about 5 such visits to the hospital and for about 3 days after,Merit gets a little ill. Her temperature goes up and some times, the injected spot swells. Usually she'd gets clingy, sour and require breastfeeding every 5 minutes and the pain she feels kills me...until she gets better and gives me her signature smiles first thing every morning again:-)
For parents, taking a healthy child to get immunized against a disease she doesn't have yet with the hopes that she'll never have them,is hard (especially when this decision inconveniences or hurts her for a short time). But again, sometimes, these decisions not only prevents our kids, but others in their path of destiny as well against varied forms of infectious diseases.
Do I think every child should be immunized? Absolutely!
June 29, 2013
The movie credits denied the events were non fictitious, no actual resemblance to real happenings but this got me thinking about vaccinations, Child immunization and the hard choices we make for our children, for their own good.
See, the thing is, immunization visits are painful for Merit, and hard for me. For the past 4 months, we had made about 5 such visits to the hospital and for about 3 days after,Merit gets a little ill. Her temperature goes up and some times, the injected spot swells. Usually she'd gets clingy, sour and require breastfeeding every 5 minutes and the pain she feels kills me...until she gets better and gives me her signature smiles first thing every morning again:-)
For parents, taking a healthy child to get immunized against a disease she doesn't have yet with the hopes that she'll never have them,is hard (especially when this decision inconveniences or hurts her for a short time). But again, sometimes, these decisions not only prevents our kids, but others in their path of destiny as well against varied forms of infectious diseases.
Do I think every child should be immunized? Absolutely!
June 29, 2013
A Worried Mum Reminises
When Merit was almost old enough to eat solids, I was a little anxious. What if she eats something she shouldn't eat? How do I give her the best, nourish her enough to grow without hitches?
'Eat whatever you intend to give her first, that is how you know. You are her designated taster now...like a guardian angel ' My Mother would advise me.
Worry.
My Mother's advice made sense though. While feeding infants who are unable to speak yet, taste their food! That way, when something unhealthy happens, the speaking adult can tell exactly what was eaten and how it tasted like.
'Eat whatever you intend to give her first, that is how you know. You are her designated taster now...like a guardian angel ' My Mother would advise me.
Worry.
My Mother's advice made sense though. While feeding infants who are unable to speak yet, taste their food! That way, when something unhealthy happens, the speaking adult can tell exactly what was eaten and how it tasted like.
Rehoboth Grounds
Jos.
While the Reverend drove and the merry passengers chatted away in fluid Hausa, I looked out the window. The distinct color of broken rocks in sight surrounded by green patches of grass and trees glides past, then the sign outsite the door of the restuarant/ bar read;
Rehoboth Grounds.
I look again.
Rehoboth Grounds.
We are slowed down by a rickety bus in front of us. An older man in a trench coat is chatting away with two other men in thick sweaters not far away...
Rehoboth Grounds.
Everybody in my view outside the window is wearing warm cloths. Sweaters. Hoods. Why are they all cold, I wander aloud.
'Wait till we get home' Des says. I look out again but Rehoboth Grounds was no longer in Sight,only fences made of cactus plants ran past. We will arrive the Reverend's new home soon and pray,we will meet many relatives too. Nice people that all spoke Hausa and a little Mada.
Rehoboth Grounds.
Remind me not to call Des 'Baby'.
Around here, I am conscious. Mother's calls are increasing in frequency too. She is a little worried now, I think.
We'd passed the Restaurant/Bar with the name that is now etched in my head. I think of Sublime street and return Merit's smile. Tinapa is still miles away. I am thinking of the Nigerian Bar conference we are supposed to attend for the rest of the week. I hope there will be another Rehoboth Grounds there too.
While the Reverend drove and the merry passengers chatted away in fluid Hausa, I looked out the window. The distinct color of broken rocks in sight surrounded by green patches of grass and trees glides past, then the sign outsite the door of the restuarant/ bar read;
Rehoboth Grounds.
I look again.
Rehoboth Grounds.
We are slowed down by a rickety bus in front of us. An older man in a trench coat is chatting away with two other men in thick sweaters not far away...
Rehoboth Grounds.
Everybody in my view outside the window is wearing warm cloths. Sweaters. Hoods. Why are they all cold, I wander aloud.
'Wait till we get home' Des says. I look out again but Rehoboth Grounds was no longer in Sight,only fences made of cactus plants ran past. We will arrive the Reverend's new home soon and pray,we will meet many relatives too. Nice people that all spoke Hausa and a little Mada.
Rehoboth Grounds.
Remind me not to call Des 'Baby'.
Around here, I am conscious. Mother's calls are increasing in frequency too. She is a little worried now, I think.
We'd passed the Restaurant/Bar with the name that is now etched in my head. I think of Sublime street and return Merit's smile. Tinapa is still miles away. I am thinking of the Nigerian Bar conference we are supposed to attend for the rest of the week. I hope there will be another Rehoboth Grounds there too.
Facebook status: August 26, 2013
Wednesday, 9 July 2014
Thoughts on Royalty, Merit and legacies.
I call my daughter 'Princess Merit'.
Wait, you must think it is one of those cliches every parent say to their daughters. You are probably right because truthfully, one would look back three generations to find the Blue Bloods from her maternal and paternal lineage. Calling my Merit 'princess' is a sort of nickname, and she smiles when I call her that. She is absolutely cute like that. To me, She is a Princess in every word and I love her to bits.
There is another way to make her a 'Princess' legitimately though.
Earlier this morning, while taking a break from writing a course material on a totally different subject, I got thinking about Royalty, the title given to the Royal families (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Royal_family) and Royalty,the usage based payments made by a party (the Licensee) to another (the Licensor) for the ongoing usage of an asset or intellectual property (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Royalties). I realised I could either make my 'Princess' a cliche, A Royalty earner or a really distant Royalty that stretched into several generations. I chose the former. Below is a short (unfinished) poem I drafted to seal my thoughts;
ROYALTY
I work hard now/
So when you ask
'Are you blue-blooded'?
My daughter can say/
'I am Royalty because my Mother earns ROYALTY from hard work, invention and copyright'.
16:22 09/07
(c) 2014, Igali Tukokumo Conquer.
Wait, you must think it is one of those cliches every parent say to their daughters. You are probably right because truthfully, one would look back three generations to find the Blue Bloods from her maternal and paternal lineage. Calling my Merit 'princess' is a sort of nickname, and she smiles when I call her that. She is absolutely cute like that. To me, She is a Princess in every word and I love her to bits.
There is another way to make her a 'Princess' legitimately though.
Earlier this morning, while taking a break from writing a course material on a totally different subject, I got thinking about Royalty, the title given to the Royal families (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Royal_family) and Royalty,the usage based payments made by a party (the Licensee) to another (the Licensor) for the ongoing usage of an asset or intellectual property (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Royalties). I realised I could either make my 'Princess' a cliche, A Royalty earner or a really distant Royalty that stretched into several generations. I chose the former. Below is a short (unfinished) poem I drafted to seal my thoughts;
ROYALTY
I work hard now/
So when you ask
'Are you blue-blooded'?
My daughter can say/
'I am Royalty because my Mother earns ROYALTY from hard work, invention and copyright'.
Princess Merit, when she was four months old.
Infectious smiles!
16:22 09/07
(c) 2014, Igali Tukokumo Conquer.
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